STANDING IN A HOSTILE WORKPLACE

"But blessed is the man who trusts me, God, the woman who sticks with God. They're like trees replanted in Eden, putting down roots near the rivers—never a worry through the hottest of summers, never dropping a leaf, serene and calm through droughts, bearing fresh fruit every season.” (Jeremiah 17:7-8, MSG).

The first time I encountered a hostile work environment, I consulted my attorney and filed a formal grievance.  The second time I encountered a hostile work environment, I consulted myself and quit my job.  The third time I encountered a hostile work environment, I consulted God.

I know all too well what it means to loathe my profession, job responsibilities, bosses and coworkers.  As a Christian, I am called to LOVE, not loathe.  The energy involved in loathing is draining, numbing and self-destructive.  Having learned from my first and second encounters, I knew consulting God was the right thing to do when havoc broke loose in the workplace a third time.

Following is a detailed account of my third encounter in a hostile workplace.  Three instances moved me to trust in Hashem (The Name)—“the holy God who dwells in our midst, hearing and answering our prayers.”  (Spangler, Ann.  Praying the Names of God.  Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 2004.).  Three coping mechanisms confirmed my trust in Hashem.  And, three reactions demonstrated my love for Hashem.

INSTANCE #1
Wednesday, November 18, 2009, approximately 3:43am

Unfortunately, sometimes we have to deal with bigots and simpletons in life.  I woke up this morning frustrated about a professional matter and I prayed Psalm 35 (The Message translation).  When I arrived to my desk part of the answer to my prayer was my inability to Log In on my computer.  Another answer is that I can visibly see that my Enemy has been caught in the trap intended for me.

INSTANCE #2
Date Unknown, approximately 12:40pm (lunch hour)

3 of us (me, KJ and my Enemy) were dining in the office break room when my Enemy spoke a racial epithet and justified the statement with a second ignorant remark.  From the soles of my feet to the top of my locs, my blood curdled.  I asked God to keep me still and calm until 1:00pm, as I repeated Isaiah 26:3 in my head:

Thou wilt keep her in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because she trusteth in thee.

As soon as I returned to my desk, I called my prayer partner and told her: “I can’t go into details, but you need to pray for me right now!”

INSTANCE #3
Tuesday, February 23, 2010, 9:43am

I received the following e-mail from my Enemy:

Subject: Please stock the fridge with caffeine-free Diet Coke

I was able to cope with the Enemy in my workplace because I kept a “heavenly perspective” and trusted God to be my Defender.  Three scriptures helped me maintain my sanity and sustain my serenity:

1. Psalm 35:4-8, MSG;
2. Proverbs 2:12, NIV; and
3. 1 Samuel 24:12-13, NIV.

COPING MECHANISM #1
Monday, November 16, 2009, approximately 4:30pm

When my Enemy asked me to type numerous pages of her handwritten notes, at the end of her workday, because she wasn’t a fast typist, I looked at her with a side-eye.

Seriously?! How is it that you’re not a fast typist, but you were hired because you’re a proficient blogger?!

It was easy for me to discern that my Enemy was conniving and thought I could not complete the transcribing task by her Wednesday, November 18, 2009 deadline.  Yet, I stayed in the office on Tuesday evening to finish the transcription of notes.  What my Enemy failed to take into account was the fact that some of her handwriting was illegible, so she had to hurriedly fill in numerous blanks within the transcript on Wednesday morning because she was due in court by 1:00pm.

When those thugs try to knife me in the back, make them look foolish. Frustrate all those who are plotting my downfall. Make them like cinders in a high wind, with God's angel working the bellows. Make their road lightless and mud-slick, with God's angel on their tails. Out of sheer cussedness they set a trap to catch me; for no good reason they dug a ditch to stop me. Surprise them with your ambush—catch them in the very trap they set, the disaster they planned for me. (Psalm 35:4-8, MSG).

COPING MECHANISM #2
Unknown Date, Approximately 12:40pm (lunch hour)

When my Enemy uttered the racial epithet in the office break room with ease, I knew she was dangerous.  Although, she did not make derogatory remarks about the African race, her remarks were obscene.  It was safe for me to assume that my Enemy’s opprobrious conduct could reoccur at any time.

Wisdom saved me from the way of a wicked woman, from a woman whose words were perverse. (Proverbs 2:12, NIV).

Though her remarks infuriated me, I stayed seated at the dining table because I did not want my Enemy to visibly see how her words rattled me.  I actually managed to convey in a peaceful tone of voice that her remarks were offensive.

COPING MECHANISM #3
Tuesday, February 23, 2010, 9:43am

When my Enemy sent me the one-liner e-mail asking me to stock the office refrigerator with her preferred beverage, I knew she bumped her head and thought my name changed to Kizzy.

Considering the previous attacks, I recognized my Enemy as being onerous and a bigot.  This third attack proved to me that she was an absolute fool!  All 14 people in our office know where the beverages are stored, so she could have easily obtained her own drink.

Again, I relied on the Word of the LORD to sustain my serenity:

May the LORD judge between you and me. And may the LORD avenge the wrongs you have done to me, but my hand will not touch you. As the old saying goes, ‘From evildoers come evil deeds,’ so my hand will not touch you. (1 Samuel 24:12-13, NIV).

Reflecting on my weeklong study of The Name, I realized that my reactions to the aforementioned instances demonstrated my love for Hashem.  According to Ann Spangler, “Loving God’s name mean upholding his reputation by reflecting his character, by trusting him, and by praying in a way that acknowledges his nature—that he is full of power, love, goodness, and faithfulness.”

REACTION #1
Wednesday, November 18, 2009, 9am-12pm

I know from my study of Proverbs that I should not “gloat when my enemy falls;” when my enemy stumbles, my heart should not rejoice.  (Proverbs 24:17, NIV).  I simply acknowledge God’s sovereignty and take notice of how God answers my prayers.

• I completed the task of transcribing voluminous handwritten notes to the best of my ability on the evening of Tuesday, November 17, 2009. 
• Although my computer wasn’t functioning properly at 9am, I still offered to help my Enemy with her task because I knew she had to be in court at 1:00pm. 
• When my computer resumed its normal function, I continued to offer assistance with numbering the transcript line by line.

WINNING RESULT

I received this one-liner e-mail from my Enemy:

Subject: Thank you for your help today.

Date: Wednesday, November 18, 2009 3:47PM

REACTION #2
1 day after the break room incident, Approximately 9:00am-11:30am

I explained to both of my bosses, in separate conversations, that I would no longer dine with their employee (my coworker & Enemy).

Since 2006, I’ve enjoyed my work and my work environment.  When I step through the office door, I uphold the reputation of a law firm that represents people of all ethnicities.  Not until yesterday did I hear a representative of this firm use a racially offensive term.  I don’t care what folks say outside of my presence, outside of this office, but I will not tolerate such revolting behavior in my workplace.  It is safe for me to assume that this employee will make an offensive comment about my ethnicity and we will have a problem.  Hence, my future lunch hours will be serene and calm, and free of their employee’s presence.

WINNING RESULTS

• My employers listened to my concerns. 
• My employers respected my decision. 
• My Enemy’s mouth was kept shut from speaking to me from that day forward, except for entertaining professional discussions.

REACTION #3

Tuesday, February 23, 2010, 9:54am-1:30pm

43 minutes into my workday and I received a ridiculous request.  The one-liner e-mail was so absurd I had to forward it to 2 people:

1. KJ, my lunch mate, friend and receptionist for the firm we share office space with; and 
2. Patricia, my prayer partner.

The e-mail I sent to KJ stated:

Date: Tuesday, February 23, 2010 9:54AM

Subject: FW: Please stock the fridge with caffeine-free Diet Coke.

UNBELIEVEABLE!!  Let’s see how long it takes me to complete this task.

The e-mail I sent to Patricia stated:
Simply because this is Malkia’s designated week for kitchen duty, I guess she thought it was appropriate to send this message to me?!  UNBELIEVABLE!

By 1:00pm my employers asked me to meet with them.  Somehow, my bosses found out about the senseless e-mail.  They asked me how I felt about the message.  Essentially, I explained that I interpreted the e-mail as laughable.

At this point, her antics are so ludicrous, it’s a waste of energy and time to respond to her foolishness because I have to complete important tasks for the both of you.  If she thought I was going to step away from my desk to put some caffeine-free Diet Coke in the refrigerator, she thought wrong—NOT TODAY!

One of my employers even suggested I speak to my Enemy, in an effort to help her understand that her request was inappropriate.  My response:

JESUS CAN HELP HER!

WINNING RESULTS

• My employers actually care about my well-being. 
• I was able to share my authentic feelings and thoughts with my employers.

Life is challenging because the workplace can be hostile.  The Enemy can show up on the job in various forms (i.e., manager, coworker, client) and “delight in doing wrong and rejoice in the perverseness of evil.”  (Proverbs 2:14, NIV).  Life is good because I can consult the Word of God and refer to the life of David to learn how to stand in a hostile work environment.  Life is abundant because when I submit myself to God and resist the Enemy, the Enemy flees; when I draw near to God, God draws near to me!  (James 4:7-8, NIV).

Dear God:

I love Your name.  I praise Your name.  I respect Your name.  “Your name, O LORD, endures forever, your renown, O LORD, through all generations.”  (Psalm 135:13, NIV).

Like David, I am not afraid to come to You and express my authentic feelings and needs.  (Psalm 54:3, 4, NIV Application Notes).  Like David, when I asked You to repay evil to my Enemy, I simply stated my confidence in Your promise to fight my battles. (Psalm 54:5, NIV Application Notes).

Enduring unwarranted mistreatment is not a foreign concept to me, so when the Enemy showed up in my current workplace, I willingly turned the entire matter over to You.  The moment I prayed The Message translation of Psalm 35, I put all of my hope in your Word and trusted You to be my Defender.  (Psalm 119:114, NIV).

O LORD, I consulted You because if it were up to me to resolve my dealings with the Enemy, I would have lost my job a year ago.  Although I have never been an advocate of violence, my Enemy’s words and behavior were worthy of 2 beat downs in the break room.  For nearly 2 years, I have endured unwarranted mistreatment from my Enemy.  O LORD, You know how many times I’ve sat at my desk and given myself the same pep talk in order to cope with my Enemy--I’ve had to remind myself of 3 things on a frequent basis:

1. It is a foreign concept for me to intentionally mistreat others;
2. It is a foreign concept for me to operate like a sphincter; and
3. It is a foreign concept for me to function at the maturity level of a zygote.

When I was on the verge of rendering a break room beat down, I reminded myself that I did not have to lose my favor, integrity and peace over someone whose path was crooked and whose ways were devious.  (Proverbs 2:15, NIV).

If it’s possible, it’s a natural occurrence for me to “live at peace with everyone.”  (Romans 12:18, NIV).  However, I must admit that I did not leave room for Your wrath after Instance #3.  (Romans 12:19, NIV).  Two days later, during my lunch hour, I shook up 4 cans of caffeine-free Diet Coke and placed them in the refrigerator door.  I did notice that my Enemy entered the break room and retrieved something from the refrigerator, but because my back was turned I was not aware of the item she retrieved.  I was certain she picked up one of the agitated cans when she returned to the break room to gather several paper towels off the spindle.  The rumble of paper towels coming off the roll was so sweet.  As that instance granted comic relief, forgive me, O LORD, for taking pleasure in vengeance.

When I review the past 2 years with "spiritual" eyes:

• my Enemy's office has always been situated down the hall from me and my bosses--like a detachment;
• my Enemy's mouth has been kept shut from speaking to me;
• my bosses never cease to ask me about my well-being;
• childbirth was the means for the temporary removal of my Enemy from the workplace; and
• acceptance of a new job was the means for the permanent removal of my Enemy from the workplace.

O LORD, I intercede for every person that encounters a hostile workplace.  Somebody dreads walking in the office doorway because the Enemy is poised to attack.  Somebody self-medicates because the Enemy’s antics prompt tension headaches.  Somebody can’t relax because their teeth are clinched, their neck is stiff, and their shoulders are tight.  Somebody is scheduling weekly therapy sessions to talk about their troubles.  Somebody is physically sick from having to share their workspace with the Enemy.  Somebody can’t rest peacefully because they’re fighting the Enemy in their sleep.  Somebody is millimeters away from committing a break room beat down.  Before they’re “overcome by evil” let them meditate on your Word.  (Romans 12:21, NIV).  If they can only speak one word, let them speak The Name, Hashem!

I am a living witness that your Word works!

If I stick with You, O God…

If I stand upright like that replanted tree in Eden…

I don’t have to worry about the heat from all the hell the Enemy raises.  I never have to stoop to the level of the Enemy.  I can have perfect peace in the midst of a hostile workplace.  I can bear the fresh fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.  (Galatians 5:22-23, NIV).

I can shout “God always wins!”

In the name of Jesus Christ...AMEN.

I will praise you forever for what you have done; in your name I will hope, for your name is good. I will praise you in the presence of your saints. (Psalm 52:9, NIV).

ALL ABOARD THE SELF-IMPROVEMENT SHUTTLE -- 1st Stop: Self-Examination

Listen to me, O Jacob, Israel, whom I have called: I am he; I am the first and I am the last. This is what the LORD says--your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: I am the LORD your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go. If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river, your righteousness like the waves of the sea. (Isaiah 48:12, 17-18, NIV).

As much as I despise public transportation, I had to take a shuttle to a weekly committee meeting.  I have been a member of the Pity Committee for years.  The committee meetings are time-consuming, but today's meeting should be brief because we're voting on the theme for our monthly Pity Party.

After a 30-minute brainstorming session, the committee votes on the Pity Party theme--Regrets of the Past.  Again, the Pity Committee Chair designates me as the Pity Party Host.  It is now my responsibility to ensure that each party guest has a great time celebrating past regrets.

• I regret not speaking up for myself.
• I regret not taking my music lessons seriously.
• I regret not taking my foreign language lessons seriously.
• I regret not having the courage to tell my first therapist what was really bothering me.
• I regret not achieving my academic goals.
• I regret not taking care of my mental, physical and spiritual health.
• I regret being involved in noxious relationships.
• I regret chasing pipe dreams--it was a waste of time and resources.
• I regret not realizing my full potential until now.

If only I had paid attention to God's exhortations, I would possess river-like peace. (Isaiah 48:18, NIV).

Dear God:

I am tired of hosting pity parties!  The party atmosphere is dismal.  Really, how much fun am I supposed to have celebrating past regrets?

Concentration on past regrets creates a sense of hopelessness and causes me to feel inadequate.  My state of mind gets so depressed that I almost convince myself that I am a failure.  What happened in my past that caused me to feel so unhappy?  What happened in my past that caused me to feel so afraid?  Lord, if I paid attention to Your instructions years ago, would I be in this disappointed state?  What's at the core of this self-pity?

You have my full attention, Lord!  I have decided that I want to evaluate myself.  I am very familiar with the inventory of my past and I know I need to make some changes for improvement.

You have my full attention, Lord!  Help me carefully examine my past.  Expose my hurts and teach me how to get better.  Reveal my God-given talents and help me stop comparing myself to others.  Unmask my wicked associates and assist me in discovering God-fearing friends.  Train my thought-life to "demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of" You; train me to "take captive every thought to make it obedient to" Jesus Christ.  (2 Corinthians 10:5, NIV).

You have my full attention, Lord!  Heal me and give me a testimony to publicize Your magnificence.

Life is challenging because focusing on past regrets can lead to wallowing in self-pity.  Life is good because I do not have to feel sorry for myself.  I can choose to improve.  I can choose to do as Christ commands: "Pick up your mat and walk!"  (John 5:8, CEV).  Life is abundant because I can aspire to forget "what lies behind and" strain "forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the [supreme and heavenly] prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward."  (Philippians 3:13-14, AMP).

You have my full attention, Lord!  I'm ready to depart from misery.  I'm ready to depart from rage.  I'm ready to depart from timidity.  I'm ready to depart from bitterness.  I'm ready to depart from trauma.  I'm ready to depart from worry.

I am ready to board the

Self-Improvement Shuttle!

Lord, I am fully aware that Self-Improvement is a P-R-O-C-E-S-S.  I know this journey will last a lifetime and I may have to revisit some destinations.  Reassure me that I'm well-equipped to go through this process.

Direct me in the way I should go.  (Isaiah 48:17, NIV).  Lead me to the next stop on this Self-Improvement route.  Reassure me that I will eventually reach the final destination of win.

I intercede for those who hesitate boarding the Self-Improvement Shuttle--Holy Spirit, please persuade them to take the liberating ride.

Sovereign God, thank you for being my Teacher.  I extol You for being my Master.  Thank you for providing me a traveling companion in Jesus Christ.  In His name, I pray...AMEN.

"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me--watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly." (Matthew 11:28-30, MSG).